Sunday, November 15, 2009

Manners Maketh the Man

No.1 son came visiting today. To be fed and watered, I suspect. The love nest is cluttered with studying and papers and heads down. So, up on his bicycle with him and off out to visit the mammy.

He's easy company. No fuss, no trouble, just feed him and he's quite happy.

After we had eaten we sat around discussing various things such as "any sign of a job yet?" or "how are you filling your days?" or "are you happy doing nothing all day?"

No, this and that and yes.

There are no jobs available in the construction industry at the moment in this country. The Recession. But now, after 3 months of unemployed bliss, he's contemplating going back to the real world. To London maybe or perhaps Canada. But what about the "Ladylove"?

Hmmm ....

"But I do have a job" he said, "I'm working in a bar 2 evenings a week and it's o.k .. not too bad really".

Turns out he is bar tending at the local Greyhound Track Bar. Frequented by the local gentry with their over-bred canines. Moneyed people.

"Tight as a chicken's ar**, most of them" he says. "Tips?? Don't be ridiculous Mum, they wouldn't give you the time of day let alone a tip".

He then went on to regale us with various horror stories of bickering and fighting between dog owners, fixing of races, performance enhancing substances in black plastic bags being found at the back of the track.

"But do you know what the worst thing about them is" he said, "they have no manners". Not a please or a thank you.

All of the offspring, at one stage or another, have commented on the lack of manners in their peers and younger children. Working part-time in local shops and bigger department stores, has given them an insight that no amount of preaching by their mother could provide. Although I did do my bit.

"Can I have an apple Mum"

"Can you have an apple what"?

"Can I have an apple Mum" slightly louder. She's old, maybe she can't hear me.

"There's a word missing".

Clink, clink as the penny drops.

"Can I have an apple PLEASE Mum?"


For years, I drummed the basics of good manners into them. I knew no better. That was the way we were brought up so what's good for the goose is good for the gander. They struggled against me. "So and so's mother doesn't make them say please and thank you ..."


But now they know.

It costs nothing to have good manners. All it takes is a little thought and respect for others. It is an easy way to show that you care for your fellow human beings. Why then do so few people behave in a mannerly way? I have no answers for this seemingly trivial question. All I know is that it makes my blood boil when a supposedly civilised person walks through a door and then lets it fly back on me when my arms are full of groceries.

No.1 son, himself has very nice manners.

Little old ladies love him.

Younger ladies too.

Manners maketh the man AND the woman.


mary said...

Here, here! It really is depressing how blase some people are these days. Civility? What's that? But when you do meet someone whose mother's nagging finally paid off, it is pure pleasure. Pure pleasure to find, in the odd individual, the kind of behaviour that was the least that was expected of us.....

Pauline said...

The "magic" words. I make my grandchildren say them; so do their parents but not as often nor as vocally as their Memere. They oblige me and I am hoping it carries over into later years!

Meggie said...

Our children had manners drummed into them, as we did by our mother. Now I am pushing the proverbial uphill to get our adult granddaughter to keep using her good manners. Small Grandson still has his...the Magic word.

Stomper Girl said...

I am very VERY bossy about manner with my children and this means I get compliments ALL THE TIME about my children and their lovely manners. It is obviously a rarity.